The Plight of Parkour
by Selene Illusinia
Summary: [Hodge Podge Family of Three] Phil comes home to find his daughter on the roof.


**Because Clint would teach Darcy how to do parkour**.

* * *

There were a lot of strange things Phil had experienced in his life. His recruitment to SHIELD, the first time he saw an army of zombies rise from the dead, and his first experience with a man who'd turned himself into a pile of ooze with a science experiment gone wrong were all on that list. But this...this was something entirely different.

Coming home to find his daughter on the roof of the townhouse with his husband trying to coach her down was...disconcerting to say the least. "Clint, why is Darcy on the roof of the house?"

In front of him, his husband turned to blink over his shoulder at Phil, confused

. Like Clint somehow couldn't understand what he was asking. "Uh, because she climbed up there?"

Internally, Phil groaned. "I had deduced that part when I realized there wasn't a ladder out. I was more wondering why she climbed onto the roof."

"I'm learning parkour Daddy!" Darcy's happy exclamation echoed down from the roof a moment before she took a heart-stopping jump through the air and grabbed a tree branch just beyond the roof's edge.

Phil thought he might actually have a heart attack as he watched Darcy hang from the branch for a second before she swung her hand around to grab another branch and hoist herself into the tree. A frown was firmly etched on her face though, brows knitted together in confusion. "Dad, where do I go next?"

"I think that's enough for today, Darce," insisted Clint instead. A glance at the archer told Phil that the other man was watching him wearily.

If this was Clint's idea, they were going to have a talk. A major talk. A very long and detailed talk about _why_ their daughter should _not be jumping off roofs_. Clint did it regularly and Phil's heart stopped each time he did. Darcy didn't need to be repeating the same moves.

"Awwww, but Dad, I was just getting good!" argued Darcy with a pout, looking down at both of her fathers sadly.

"Darcy," warned Phil, afflicting what Clint had dubbed his 'hot father voice that could make anyone want to roll over and do whatever he said'. He could see Clint cringing out of the corner of his eyes this time though, a touch of guilt painted across the other man's face. "Get down here now! Before you get hurt."

"Dad will catch me if I fall," argued Darcy, pointing down. "Besides, we have a net!"

"A net?" muttered Phil a moment before he looked down to where Darcy was pointing. Sure enough, there was a net spread over the space between the tree and house- exactly where Darcy had been jumping. It was strung up the same as a circus net, the type used to catch trapeze artists should they fall. Well, at least Clint was taking safety seriously.

As if reading Phil's mind, Clint leaned towards Phil and dropped a hand on his shoulder. "Hey, I wouldn't let her do this without taking precautions. She's precious to me, too."

That almost made Phil blush; of course Darcy mattered to Clint, she's his daughter. And it was callus of Phil to assume Clint would ever let Darcy jump off the roof of the house without making sure she would be safe doing it. Then again, Phil didn't exactly like the idea of Darcy jumping off the roof of the house to begin with.

Sighing, Phil shook his head as Darcy continued to pout down at him. "One last try. I want you down after this."

Her pout lessened slightly, though she still looked put out that her fun had been ruined. All the same, she looked at Clint. He just nodded at her and moved to stand under the net. "Alright Darce, Daddy says this is the last jump. Look around, where do you think you can reach next? And remember, keep the net under you."

"Okay Dad," agreed Darcy as she looked around among the tree limbs.

Apparently spotting her next move, she shifted in the tree and dropped so she was hanging from the branches she'd just jumped to. Swinging her legs a little, she let go of the branch on a forward swing and reached for a branch a little lower down. Her fingers grazed the branch but didn't catch and she went tumbling into the net below her. Phil was almost positive half his hair would be gray tomorrow morning.

For a second, she bounced once, twice, then rolled over in the net and looked down at Clint with a pout. "Did I do it wrong?"

"Nope, that move works," stated Clint simply, grabbing a ladder from where it was laying on the ground beside the house.

He leaned it up against the side of the house, climbing up until he was level with the net. Without prompting, Darcy rolled over and crawled towards him, grabbing his arm when he was in range and pulling herself up to cling to his neck. Carefully, Clint wrapped his arm around her and carried the eight year old down the ladder.

As soon as they were on the ground, Phil was beside them, reaching for Darcy. Clint relinquished her without argument, letting Phil hug his daughter tightly. Darcy returned her father's hug, though she made a noise of protest when he squeezed her a little too hard.

"Daddy, let go!" exclaimed the little girl after a moment. "I'm fine!"

Loosening his hold, Phil let his daughter squirm out of his arms. She looked up at the side of the house sadly once he'd released her before looking over at Clint. "We can't practice parkour anymore, can we?"

Clint glanced at Phil, wincing a bit when noted the look on Phil's face. "No, I don't think so Darcy."

"Not on the side of the house, you can't," confirmed Phil, his brow furrowing. "What is parkour anyway?"

"It's this cool thing where you jump off buildings and climb stuff without ladders!" exclaimed Darcy, her excitement growing almost immediately. Her eyes went wide as she explained, clearly very interested in whatever this parkour thing was. "Dad said we could try it a few times outside, with a net, and if I liked it, he'd talk to you about building a course in the backyard!"

"A course in the backyard," repeated Phil, shooting Clint a look. For his part, Clint shrugged and didn't look too phased. Apparently, he hadn't thought Phil would object that much to the idea. "What would this 'course' entail?"

"A climbing wall, some ropes, a few platforms she could jump on," replied Clint as if he'd already drawn up the plans. Then again, knowing his husband, Clint probably _had_ plans. "And mats, of course. Or nets and sand if you didn't want to have to worry about picking up the mats."

Phil's eyes moved back up to the roof where Darcy had jumped from just moments before. "Nothing as high as the roof, I hope."

"Nah, nothing that high," assured Clint with a shrug. "Too much zoning paperwork and bureaucracy."

"Aka, paperwork," surmised Phil with a chuckle. Glancing at his daughter, who was still looking at him with wide, excited eyes, he let out a heavy sigh. There was no way he could say no to her. "I reserve the right to veto any obstacles and insist on having a final say on the safety precautions."

Darcy nearly cheered as she threw her arms around Phil again, pressing her face into his side gleefully. "Thank you Daddy!"

"You're welcome Darcy," sighed Phil, returning his daughter's hug. "But you won't be allowed to use it without one of us outside with you and no complaining about the height of anything. It doesn't matter if you're five inches off the ground or five feet, the jump will be the same."

"Deal," agreed Darcy, releasing Phil to run to Clint. He was more prepared that Phil, kneeling down to scoop the little girl up into his arms. "Dad! We get to build a course!"

"I know, Darce," laughed Clint, offering Phil a blinding grin. "It's a perfect family project, don't you think Phil?"

"Mm, agreed," sighed Phil in resignation. This project was going to be a nightmare and Darcy was going to make him prematurely gray, but if it made his family happy, he'd deal with it. Besides, Clint would handle all of the emergency room visits; he'd make sure of it.


End file.
